Farewell friends

Goodbye. Sayonara. This is the end. Ta ra. All the best.

No, I'm not dying. Besides which, if I was none of those would be my final words, I'd much rather go with "The treasure is in the...urgh", much more fun.

Recently I've said quite a few goodbyes. I changed jobs. We moved house. I swapped my brain into that of a robot before my body was disintegrated. Hang on, that last one was a film, sorry.

So I decided that the time had also come for the semi-regular facebook cull. You know, where you actually look at the people you are connected to and ask the question "Who the?".

I think I was inspired when I was de-friended by someone who I used to work with. I say someone, more one of the biggest cows I've ever met in my life (ooh, get me). Seriously, enormous cow of a woman. So big I think Cravendale and Nesquik had shares in her. Anyway, we had been 'friends' for 18 months and I have no idea why. Politeness I guess.

I think I have a politeness about us these days that influences our behaviour. No matter who it is, I end up having a conversation in my head like this

"Ah, Hitler has sent me a friend request again. Can I really ignore him again. He'll know that i'm stalling and start thinking bad of me. Oh, maybe I should just accept and then limit his status updates. Besides which, he's been quite quiet since the 40's."

Or sometimes it's the people you've met for less than 2 minutes that you become friends with. If the ticket inspector from the train I went on last week sent me a friend request I think I'd have to accept, again out of politeness.

So no more. I've been brutal. I've culled all over the place.

10% of 'friends' have gone for a variety of reasons. There's the ones who never update their status (i'm pretty sure one of them is dead), there's the one who regularly posts 70's racist style comments, the people I've never actually met, the odd psycho, or the one who beat me up at school when I was 5 (did I really think 30 years ago "I hope I'm still in touch with him in three decades).

So if you're reading this, it's likely that you've followed the facebook link and that you have been saved from the cull. You can consider yourself fortunate or unfortunate, that's up to you.

Of course that might just inspire you to get rid of me. If so, goodbye. Sayonara. This is the end. Ta ra. All the best.